Chapter 3
The moment I wake up I'm thinking about Will again. I pretty much have to force myself to go to work. I can't stop thinking about what might or might not happen with us being alone together. It's so bad that I almost completely ruin a haircut while I'm working and have to cut all of a woman's hair an entire inch shorter than it was going to be. I end up going home even earlier than I was going to because I can't focus at work. The minute I'm home though I'm cleaning again. I can't seem to just sit down when everywhere I look I see something I forgot to do. I am mopping the kitchen floor when I hear a knock on the door. I freeze for a good few seconds then take a deep breathe and walk over to the entrance. When I open the door to see Will I'm sure I must look completely frazzled because he doesn't seem very impressed with how I look.
“So can I come in?” He asks not giving anything away but his tone of voice. I smile at him but it's a little harder for me to open the door and actually let him in. He looks around at my nearly spotless apartment and I start to wonder if it obvious that I have gone overboard. “Are you sure you want me here? We can still go somewhere else if you want to.” He offers and I bite my lip unsure of what to say to him. I have been worrying myself over this all day.
“I want you here.” I tell him and Will grins at me heading into my kitchen. He goes right to the fridge and opens it up. When he turns around he hands me a beer.
“Drink this. Calm down. You need to relax. Nothing is going to happen today. You are way to ramped up for me to even think about anything sexual.” He tells me and I laugh a little but even that comes out awkward. I take the beer honestly a bit glad that he wants me to drink it. I know as much as he does that I need to relax. I take a long gulp drinking about half the can in one swig. Will just grins at me though as he grabs a can of soda for himself. “So I brought two movies to choose from. I went with comedies, I thought it might be best to stay away from anything sexual. So I brought Grown Ups and Monty Python's The Holy Grail. Since it's your place you can choose which one you want to watch first.” He tells me and while I've seen the second one before it's been a while; I haven't seen the first one at all.
“Let's watch the first one. Grown Ups.” I tell him taking the DVD cases that he offers and looking on the back a little. I figure he probably made the right choice with a comedy I don't think I would make it though anything with a love scene in it right now. I stick the movie in and hit play before I grab a second beer since my first is almost gone. I finish the first can before the previews finish but I'm feeling way more relaxed as I sit down on my couch. Even when Will sits down close but not quite next to me I'm not as anxious as I was when he arrived. Still I'm only half paying attention to the movie. I take another drink of my beer as Will scoots the littlest bit toward me. I try to focus into the movie and it works for a little while. I find myself laughing but then I feel a hand on my leg. I turn to see Will actually next to me now but he shushes me before I can talk.
“Relax, I just want to hold you.” He tells me and I find myself slowly nodding. It's hard for me to speak though, so I just smile at him and move a little closer. Will moves as well sliding his body back and placing one of his legs stretched out behind my back. I grin a little awkwardly but Will pulls me back so my back is pressed against his chest. I let out a shaky breath but then I feel a soft kiss pressed to my neck and it makes me shiver. “Just relax.” He says again and I sigh trying to do as he says. I take another drink of my beer and it helps me mellow down a little. “How are you feeling?” He asks but then he kisses my neck again and I'm not really able to answer him until he stops.
“Well that feels really good.” I say softly and then I hear him laugh.
“I'm glad you decided to have me over today. This is nice.” He tells me sliding his hands onto my hips again and staying there this time despite the fact that my body is already pressed into his. I can't help but want to actually kiss him again. I turn around in his grip to look at him and Will has that constant grin on his face again. I smile back at him the alcohol in my system has loosened me up enough that it isn't too hard for me to press my lips to his. Since I'm the one starting it this time I'm more at ease knowing what is going on. Our lips move against each other slowly almost lazily for a good few seconds. Then I feel Will's tongue lightly lapping at my lips and I slide my own tongue out to play as well. The kiss deepens and I feel arms wrap around my neck. I move closer and place my hands on his hips. We don't pull away for a while but the embrace doesn't go further either. I find myself a little confused because I'm starting to get a bit turned on, but Will doesn't seem to be trying to do anything other than kiss me. I'm not exactly sure how to push it to the next level on my own either. So instead I pull away and grin very awkwardly at Will.
He just smiles easily though and doesn't seem effected at all. So then my mind just travels down an entirely different track. Maybe he isn't as attracted to me as it seems. Maybe he isn't turned on right now like I am. “What are you thinking?” He asks softly as his hand strokes my cheek.
“Just that I enjoyed that.” I say almost cryptically and Will gives me a bit of a look. “I um really enjoyed that.” I say putting a little more emphasis on my words and he grins at me again.
“Is that an issue?” He asks leaning into me and whispering into my ear. I shudder feeling a shiver go straight to my dick at him breathing into my ear.
“Kind of. Or um it might end up being an issue. If nothing happens.” I tell him feeling very awkward right now. Will just laughs again though and I'm not sure if he quite understands what I mean. “I'm kind of starting to get hard.” I say bluntly even though I feel a little like an idiot for just flat out saying it. Will grins like he is trying very hard not to laugh again.
“Yea, I understood that. I just don't want to start anything right now. We don't know each other that well and you've been drinking. I think it's still better that we hold off on losing any clothes.” He tells me yet he doesn't pull away from me. Then he leans closer to me and whispers in my ear again. “I'm glad you feel the same way I do though. I really want to do something too.” He tells me and it certainly doesn't help any matters. I smile at him a bit awkwardly again as I feel a little embarrassed but I'm unsure of what to say now. It doesn't seem like we are getting anywhere though.
“So... if you want to and I want to then why not?” I ask him taking another drink of my beer and leaning in to kiss him again. Will places his finger on my lips though carefully stopping me.
“Not yet. I want everything to be right and that means without the liquid courage. I don't think you're ready for this yet.” He tells me and with that he actually does pull away from me this time. “You have to trust me.” He says and I sigh slowly nodding my head. “Let's finish watching the movie.” He tells me even though I've probably missed half of the movie by now.
“Not fair.” I say under breath but Will must hear me since I hear him laugh again.
“I know.” He whispers softly. The movie keeps going and surprisingly Will doesn't make any move to touch me again. Then it ends and I'm no better off then I was twenty minutes ago. I bite my lip and slowly turn around to look at Will again but now most of the alcohol is out of my system or rather I still feel a little more at ease but not as slightly giddy as I did.
“So what happens now? I don't think I can make it through another movie with you right next to me.” I tell him honestly and Will laughs.
“Well then maybe it's time for me to leave. It was nice spending some time with you though. I actually need to do a few things before I leave in the morning.” He tells me and I sigh a little.
“So then nothing?” I ask with a bit of a smile and Will leans a little closer to me.
“Not right now. Just one more thing before I go though.” Then he kisses me again pressing his body tightly into mine. I kiss him back hard and press myself into him. As we are kissing though Will lies back a bit and I climb further onto the couch and straddle his legs. While we're making out I feel my dick throb and instinctively I thrust my hips down into his. Will moans thrusting his hips as well but his hand grab my hips and stop me. “Jeremy trust me.” He tells me and then I feel his erection pulsing against my leg through his pants. It's enough to make me pause though, it reminds me that maybe this isn't as simple as just going for it. I nod to him and pull away.
“Maybe you're right. You should get going then. Don't forget your movies.” I tell him and with that I climb off of him and the couch. “I'll be right back I just need to use the restroom.” I tell him but really I just need a moment to compose myself. I quickly walk to the restroom and close the door behind me. I am way over my head here. I turn on the faucet at the sink and then splash some cold water on my face. It helps a little but I'm amazed how red my face is right now. I dry off but I don't think I would be able to pee right now if I tried. I take a couple of deep breaths before I walk back out of the bathroom.
When I get to the living room again Will seems to be a bit better off as well. He is standing with the movies in his hand and clearly waiting for me. “So what did you think of the movie?” He asks with a grin.
“It was funny. I really liked the scene at the water park with the milk.” I tell him and he smiles nodding slightly.
“So I leave tomorrow. Text me or message me though. I want to keep in contact with you.” He tells me and this time I nod. “I'll see you soon.” He tells me and then he walks to the door. I follow him to let him out but I'm sorely tempted to kiss Will again. Some how I manage to just open the door though.
“I'll message you later. Bye.” I tell him and Will nods.
“Goodbye.” Then he leaves going to his car. I watch him for a few moments but eventually I have to go back inside. Once I close the door I slam my head into it. I am such an idiot. How is any of this even remotely going to work? I have never done anything sexual with a guy before and I am so out of my league here. It almost seems easy but then something like this happens. The weird thing though is I'm still really turned on. It seems like I almost forget about everything while in the moment, but I'm sure that it was on Will's mind since he kept it from going any further. I'm not sure how he keeps such a cool head in all of this.
Then another thought comes to my head. Surprisingly I'm in a situation now that isn't too different from Jamie's not long ago. I mean I know what I'm getting in to from the beginning but Scott didn't. Jamie had to keep things from getting serious while Scott thought he was he was girl. Then once Scott found out it still had to be hard for him. I gave him so much shit for all of that but I know it had to be harder then it seemed. Now I have more in common with him and I kind of understand this more. It makes me feel like crap now thinking of all this. I think maybe I actually should talk to Jamie, maybe even talk to Scott too.
Right now though I think I just need to take my mind off of all this. I sit down on the couch again but then I see that Will left the movies after all. I grin and go ahead and pop in the other movie. It helps me to relax a bit until I get to the castle anthrax part. All of the slutty girls talking about spankings. It makes me laugh a bit but at the same time it makes me think of Will again. My pants get a little tighter thinking of him and this time it isn't as easy to brush it off. I adjust myself a little moving my pants to the side but my hand brushes lightly over my cock and I moan. I pause the movie and massage myself a little through my pants. It's been a while since I've done anything even by myself. I think of when I was kissing Will again. It felt really good especially when we were making out and our groins rubbed together a bit. I pull out my dick and start to stroke myself. I think about making out with Will and start to wonder about possibly doing something else with him. Unsurprisingly my thoughts stay on his lips thinking of them wrapped around my cock instead. It's been a while since I've had a blow job and I'm sure he is good at it. Just the thought of those smirking lips sliding up and down is more than enough to get me going. I stroke a little faster and it doesn't take much to get me to the point of cumming. Still I'm a little amazed by how strong the orgasm is. I am really turned on by him. I think I'm going to have an issue here.
I end up distracting myself about Will for the rest of the day. I just don't want to call him again and say something stupid. I decide not to contact Will until I know he is gone. It's only a few hours but it feels like more. I try to distract myself further and manage it until it is time to go the sleep. When I wake up I have another issue though. It's one of my rare days off and the only thing on my mind is Will. Still I'm determined not to contact him until I know he is out of town. So I decide to call Jamie instead. Still it's hard to even make myself call him. So I'm a little surprised when Jamie answers on just the second ring. “Hello.” I don't say anything for a few seconds. “Jeremy I know that you're there I saw your name so come on say something.” He says and then I laugh. “Alright so we've determined that you can hear me and I'm guessing you want to talk about something so...” He trails off and I sigh this time.
“Yea I'm here. Just not sure how I want to talk about this.” I say not knowing how to approach any of this.
“So is this about that guy you like?” He asks and I hate how easily he picks up on what's bugging me.
“Yea it is. I saw him again and we kind of went out on a couple of dates.” I say and Jamie laughs a little.
“It's only been a couple of days.” He says and I shake my head a little trying to remember that he is right.
“I know. He's leaving town today. We went out for lunch Wednesday and then yesterday he came over and we watched a movie.” I say and for a moment Jamie doesn't respond.
“So what's the issue here? That sounds like it's going pretty well.” He tells me and the thing is he is right it is going well.
“We kissed. And I liked it... a lot. Nothing else happened though. He insisted that we didn't do anything because he knows I haven't been with a guy before. He said we should get to know each other better before we do anything.” I tell him and the thing is I do understand where Will is coming from on all of this I just also don't usually go this slow.
“Jeremy think about it. You haven't exactly got a lot of experience here. It actually makes a lot of sense. Not to mention that I doubt you two have talked at all about who is going to bottom. It could be a pretty big conversation. Do you even know if you would be willing to because he might expect you to. Most gay guys are kind of switch hitters on that it's an even trade.” He tells me and I force myself to take a deep breath trying to think about what he just said. I didn't really think that I might be doing that as well. I guess it does make sense though. “Jeremy are you still there?” He asks when I've been quiet for a while.
“Yea I'm here, just thinking. I feel like I'm really over my head here. How did you even get anywhere with Scott? I feel like a teenage virgin again.” I tell him and Jamie just laughs.
“You know I almost want to feel bad for you but I just can't. This is too funny that you are actually dating a guy when you have told me so many times how straight you are.” He says and I shake my head a little.
“Jamie please.” I say softly and I can hear a slight chuckle as he attempts to keep himself from laughing.
“Ok, ok. So when you were a teenager and didn't have experience with girls what did you do to sort of figure things out?” He asks and I have a feeling I know what he is hinting at here but it seems strange to say it.
“So are you saying I should watch gay porn?” I ask and it makes Jamie laugh again.
“If it helps. It might give you a little more perspective of what really happens. In any case it can't hurt. That and maybe try to bring it up with the guy if he's more of a bottom or something. You are an adult now you should be able to just talk about sex.” He tells me and I find it a little ironic that I am able to with Jamie but not so much with some one I'm actually interested in.
“Alright well if that's all the help you are then maybe I should just let you go back to corrupting Scott.” I tell him and Jamie just laughs again.
“Ok but really it could help.” He says again and I shake my head a little.
“I'll talk to you later Jamie.” I tell him about to hang up even if he doesn't say goodbye.
“Fine. Bye Jeremy.” He tells me and I laugh a little.
“Goodbye Jamie.” Then I hang up and I'm left alone with my thoughts again. Porn. Of all the advice he could have given me Jamie says that I should watch gay porn. I mean it's not the stupidest idea in the world but it sounds so juvenile. I mean porn isn't exactly the most realistic example in the world. Still maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to give it a shot. I bite my lip a little and then decide to give it a go. I grab my laptop and head to my bedroom. I hesitate for another moment thinking if I should get a little more comfortable before I start this. I end up stripping down to my boxers but I leave those on since I'm unsure of what this is actually going to make me feel. Then I go to a porn website on my laptop and settle on to the bed.
I almost chicken out and click onto something else but stop and take a deep breath before looking at the screen again. I click into the different categories and onto the gay portion of the website. Instantly tons of little screen-shots pop up with men in various states of undress. I bite my lip and just randomly click on one of the videos. It starts with a couple of guys talking in a room and I relax a little just watching it unfold. Then one of the guys, the smaller of the two starts to rub the other through his pants. I lick my lips a little not sure if this is actually turning me on or not. Then they are kissing and I smile thinking that I am at least ok with that part of it. Then the smaller one moves again undoing the other's pants and pulling them down to reveal his hard cock. The bigger one isn't wearing underwear so it just sort of pops out.
I'm a little amazed to find my eyes drawn instantly to his dick and it makes me feel a little strange. When the little one starts to give the other a blow job though I can't take my eyes away at all. Watching those lips slide up and down is very erotic and I feel my heart beating faster as I start to get turned on. I massage myself a little through my boxers as I keep watching the video. Then more clothes come off and suddenly they are both naked. I bite my lip again as the smaller one is now on his hands and knees with his ass bare and right in front of the camera. I have an idea of what is going to happen next but I'm still a little uneasy about it. Then I'm surprised a little though as the bigger man pulls apart the other's butt cheeks then starts licking his butt hole. I cringe a little at the thought but I keep watching. As he works him over with his tongue he starts to finger him as well and that more so than the licking is weirdly erotic as well.
I push my boxers down a bit and start to jerk myself off. I lick my lips again watching him get fingered and then they pull away again. This time when they come together again though there is actual sex. It's strange for me to watching as the large dick enters the tight hole. It's a little shocking how much it turns me on though. My thoughts go to Will and I think about possibly having sex with him. I wonder how it would be to be in a hole that is much tighter then what I'm used to. I moan jerking off faster at this thought and it doesn't take long for me to get to the edge. I lie further back not even bothering to look at the screen now as I jerk myself to completion. Then I hit my climax hard and cum. The intensity of the orgasm is amazing and all I can think of is how good it will feel to have the real thing.
“So can I come in?” He asks not giving anything away but his tone of voice. I smile at him but it's a little harder for me to open the door and actually let him in. He looks around at my nearly spotless apartment and I start to wonder if it obvious that I have gone overboard. “Are you sure you want me here? We can still go somewhere else if you want to.” He offers and I bite my lip unsure of what to say to him. I have been worrying myself over this all day.
“I want you here.” I tell him and Will grins at me heading into my kitchen. He goes right to the fridge and opens it up. When he turns around he hands me a beer.
“Drink this. Calm down. You need to relax. Nothing is going to happen today. You are way to ramped up for me to even think about anything sexual.” He tells me and I laugh a little but even that comes out awkward. I take the beer honestly a bit glad that he wants me to drink it. I know as much as he does that I need to relax. I take a long gulp drinking about half the can in one swig. Will just grins at me though as he grabs a can of soda for himself. “So I brought two movies to choose from. I went with comedies, I thought it might be best to stay away from anything sexual. So I brought Grown Ups and Monty Python's The Holy Grail. Since it's your place you can choose which one you want to watch first.” He tells me and while I've seen the second one before it's been a while; I haven't seen the first one at all.
“Let's watch the first one. Grown Ups.” I tell him taking the DVD cases that he offers and looking on the back a little. I figure he probably made the right choice with a comedy I don't think I would make it though anything with a love scene in it right now. I stick the movie in and hit play before I grab a second beer since my first is almost gone. I finish the first can before the previews finish but I'm feeling way more relaxed as I sit down on my couch. Even when Will sits down close but not quite next to me I'm not as anxious as I was when he arrived. Still I'm only half paying attention to the movie. I take another drink of my beer as Will scoots the littlest bit toward me. I try to focus into the movie and it works for a little while. I find myself laughing but then I feel a hand on my leg. I turn to see Will actually next to me now but he shushes me before I can talk.
“Relax, I just want to hold you.” He tells me and I find myself slowly nodding. It's hard for me to speak though, so I just smile at him and move a little closer. Will moves as well sliding his body back and placing one of his legs stretched out behind my back. I grin a little awkwardly but Will pulls me back so my back is pressed against his chest. I let out a shaky breath but then I feel a soft kiss pressed to my neck and it makes me shiver. “Just relax.” He says again and I sigh trying to do as he says. I take another drink of my beer and it helps me mellow down a little. “How are you feeling?” He asks but then he kisses my neck again and I'm not really able to answer him until he stops.
“Well that feels really good.” I say softly and then I hear him laugh.
“I'm glad you decided to have me over today. This is nice.” He tells me sliding his hands onto my hips again and staying there this time despite the fact that my body is already pressed into his. I can't help but want to actually kiss him again. I turn around in his grip to look at him and Will has that constant grin on his face again. I smile back at him the alcohol in my system has loosened me up enough that it isn't too hard for me to press my lips to his. Since I'm the one starting it this time I'm more at ease knowing what is going on. Our lips move against each other slowly almost lazily for a good few seconds. Then I feel Will's tongue lightly lapping at my lips and I slide my own tongue out to play as well. The kiss deepens and I feel arms wrap around my neck. I move closer and place my hands on his hips. We don't pull away for a while but the embrace doesn't go further either. I find myself a little confused because I'm starting to get a bit turned on, but Will doesn't seem to be trying to do anything other than kiss me. I'm not exactly sure how to push it to the next level on my own either. So instead I pull away and grin very awkwardly at Will.
He just smiles easily though and doesn't seem effected at all. So then my mind just travels down an entirely different track. Maybe he isn't as attracted to me as it seems. Maybe he isn't turned on right now like I am. “What are you thinking?” He asks softly as his hand strokes my cheek.
“Just that I enjoyed that.” I say almost cryptically and Will gives me a bit of a look. “I um really enjoyed that.” I say putting a little more emphasis on my words and he grins at me again.
“Is that an issue?” He asks leaning into me and whispering into my ear. I shudder feeling a shiver go straight to my dick at him breathing into my ear.
“Kind of. Or um it might end up being an issue. If nothing happens.” I tell him feeling very awkward right now. Will just laughs again though and I'm not sure if he quite understands what I mean. “I'm kind of starting to get hard.” I say bluntly even though I feel a little like an idiot for just flat out saying it. Will grins like he is trying very hard not to laugh again.
“Yea, I understood that. I just don't want to start anything right now. We don't know each other that well and you've been drinking. I think it's still better that we hold off on losing any clothes.” He tells me yet he doesn't pull away from me. Then he leans closer to me and whispers in my ear again. “I'm glad you feel the same way I do though. I really want to do something too.” He tells me and it certainly doesn't help any matters. I smile at him a bit awkwardly again as I feel a little embarrassed but I'm unsure of what to say now. It doesn't seem like we are getting anywhere though.
“So... if you want to and I want to then why not?” I ask him taking another drink of my beer and leaning in to kiss him again. Will places his finger on my lips though carefully stopping me.
“Not yet. I want everything to be right and that means without the liquid courage. I don't think you're ready for this yet.” He tells me and with that he actually does pull away from me this time. “You have to trust me.” He says and I sigh slowly nodding my head. “Let's finish watching the movie.” He tells me even though I've probably missed half of the movie by now.
“Not fair.” I say under breath but Will must hear me since I hear him laugh again.
“I know.” He whispers softly. The movie keeps going and surprisingly Will doesn't make any move to touch me again. Then it ends and I'm no better off then I was twenty minutes ago. I bite my lip and slowly turn around to look at Will again but now most of the alcohol is out of my system or rather I still feel a little more at ease but not as slightly giddy as I did.
“So what happens now? I don't think I can make it through another movie with you right next to me.” I tell him honestly and Will laughs.
“Well then maybe it's time for me to leave. It was nice spending some time with you though. I actually need to do a few things before I leave in the morning.” He tells me and I sigh a little.
“So then nothing?” I ask with a bit of a smile and Will leans a little closer to me.
“Not right now. Just one more thing before I go though.” Then he kisses me again pressing his body tightly into mine. I kiss him back hard and press myself into him. As we are kissing though Will lies back a bit and I climb further onto the couch and straddle his legs. While we're making out I feel my dick throb and instinctively I thrust my hips down into his. Will moans thrusting his hips as well but his hand grab my hips and stop me. “Jeremy trust me.” He tells me and then I feel his erection pulsing against my leg through his pants. It's enough to make me pause though, it reminds me that maybe this isn't as simple as just going for it. I nod to him and pull away.
“Maybe you're right. You should get going then. Don't forget your movies.” I tell him and with that I climb off of him and the couch. “I'll be right back I just need to use the restroom.” I tell him but really I just need a moment to compose myself. I quickly walk to the restroom and close the door behind me. I am way over my head here. I turn on the faucet at the sink and then splash some cold water on my face. It helps a little but I'm amazed how red my face is right now. I dry off but I don't think I would be able to pee right now if I tried. I take a couple of deep breaths before I walk back out of the bathroom.
When I get to the living room again Will seems to be a bit better off as well. He is standing with the movies in his hand and clearly waiting for me. “So what did you think of the movie?” He asks with a grin.
“It was funny. I really liked the scene at the water park with the milk.” I tell him and he smiles nodding slightly.
“So I leave tomorrow. Text me or message me though. I want to keep in contact with you.” He tells me and this time I nod. “I'll see you soon.” He tells me and then he walks to the door. I follow him to let him out but I'm sorely tempted to kiss Will again. Some how I manage to just open the door though.
“I'll message you later. Bye.” I tell him and Will nods.
“Goodbye.” Then he leaves going to his car. I watch him for a few moments but eventually I have to go back inside. Once I close the door I slam my head into it. I am such an idiot. How is any of this even remotely going to work? I have never done anything sexual with a guy before and I am so out of my league here. It almost seems easy but then something like this happens. The weird thing though is I'm still really turned on. It seems like I almost forget about everything while in the moment, but I'm sure that it was on Will's mind since he kept it from going any further. I'm not sure how he keeps such a cool head in all of this.
Then another thought comes to my head. Surprisingly I'm in a situation now that isn't too different from Jamie's not long ago. I mean I know what I'm getting in to from the beginning but Scott didn't. Jamie had to keep things from getting serious while Scott thought he was he was girl. Then once Scott found out it still had to be hard for him. I gave him so much shit for all of that but I know it had to be harder then it seemed. Now I have more in common with him and I kind of understand this more. It makes me feel like crap now thinking of all this. I think maybe I actually should talk to Jamie, maybe even talk to Scott too.
Right now though I think I just need to take my mind off of all this. I sit down on the couch again but then I see that Will left the movies after all. I grin and go ahead and pop in the other movie. It helps me to relax a bit until I get to the castle anthrax part. All of the slutty girls talking about spankings. It makes me laugh a bit but at the same time it makes me think of Will again. My pants get a little tighter thinking of him and this time it isn't as easy to brush it off. I adjust myself a little moving my pants to the side but my hand brushes lightly over my cock and I moan. I pause the movie and massage myself a little through my pants. It's been a while since I've done anything even by myself. I think of when I was kissing Will again. It felt really good especially when we were making out and our groins rubbed together a bit. I pull out my dick and start to stroke myself. I think about making out with Will and start to wonder about possibly doing something else with him. Unsurprisingly my thoughts stay on his lips thinking of them wrapped around my cock instead. It's been a while since I've had a blow job and I'm sure he is good at it. Just the thought of those smirking lips sliding up and down is more than enough to get me going. I stroke a little faster and it doesn't take much to get me to the point of cumming. Still I'm a little amazed by how strong the orgasm is. I am really turned on by him. I think I'm going to have an issue here.
I end up distracting myself about Will for the rest of the day. I just don't want to call him again and say something stupid. I decide not to contact Will until I know he is gone. It's only a few hours but it feels like more. I try to distract myself further and manage it until it is time to go the sleep. When I wake up I have another issue though. It's one of my rare days off and the only thing on my mind is Will. Still I'm determined not to contact him until I know he is out of town. So I decide to call Jamie instead. Still it's hard to even make myself call him. So I'm a little surprised when Jamie answers on just the second ring. “Hello.” I don't say anything for a few seconds. “Jeremy I know that you're there I saw your name so come on say something.” He says and then I laugh. “Alright so we've determined that you can hear me and I'm guessing you want to talk about something so...” He trails off and I sigh this time.
“Yea I'm here. Just not sure how I want to talk about this.” I say not knowing how to approach any of this.
“So is this about that guy you like?” He asks and I hate how easily he picks up on what's bugging me.
“Yea it is. I saw him again and we kind of went out on a couple of dates.” I say and Jamie laughs a little.
“It's only been a couple of days.” He says and I shake my head a little trying to remember that he is right.
“I know. He's leaving town today. We went out for lunch Wednesday and then yesterday he came over and we watched a movie.” I say and for a moment Jamie doesn't respond.
“So what's the issue here? That sounds like it's going pretty well.” He tells me and the thing is he is right it is going well.
“We kissed. And I liked it... a lot. Nothing else happened though. He insisted that we didn't do anything because he knows I haven't been with a guy before. He said we should get to know each other better before we do anything.” I tell him and the thing is I do understand where Will is coming from on all of this I just also don't usually go this slow.
“Jeremy think about it. You haven't exactly got a lot of experience here. It actually makes a lot of sense. Not to mention that I doubt you two have talked at all about who is going to bottom. It could be a pretty big conversation. Do you even know if you would be willing to because he might expect you to. Most gay guys are kind of switch hitters on that it's an even trade.” He tells me and I force myself to take a deep breath trying to think about what he just said. I didn't really think that I might be doing that as well. I guess it does make sense though. “Jeremy are you still there?” He asks when I've been quiet for a while.
“Yea I'm here, just thinking. I feel like I'm really over my head here. How did you even get anywhere with Scott? I feel like a teenage virgin again.” I tell him and Jamie just laughs.
“You know I almost want to feel bad for you but I just can't. This is too funny that you are actually dating a guy when you have told me so many times how straight you are.” He says and I shake my head a little.
“Jamie please.” I say softly and I can hear a slight chuckle as he attempts to keep himself from laughing.
“Ok, ok. So when you were a teenager and didn't have experience with girls what did you do to sort of figure things out?” He asks and I have a feeling I know what he is hinting at here but it seems strange to say it.
“So are you saying I should watch gay porn?” I ask and it makes Jamie laugh again.
“If it helps. It might give you a little more perspective of what really happens. In any case it can't hurt. That and maybe try to bring it up with the guy if he's more of a bottom or something. You are an adult now you should be able to just talk about sex.” He tells me and I find it a little ironic that I am able to with Jamie but not so much with some one I'm actually interested in.
“Alright well if that's all the help you are then maybe I should just let you go back to corrupting Scott.” I tell him and Jamie just laughs again.
“Ok but really it could help.” He says again and I shake my head a little.
“I'll talk to you later Jamie.” I tell him about to hang up even if he doesn't say goodbye.
“Fine. Bye Jeremy.” He tells me and I laugh a little.
“Goodbye Jamie.” Then I hang up and I'm left alone with my thoughts again. Porn. Of all the advice he could have given me Jamie says that I should watch gay porn. I mean it's not the stupidest idea in the world but it sounds so juvenile. I mean porn isn't exactly the most realistic example in the world. Still maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to give it a shot. I bite my lip a little and then decide to give it a go. I grab my laptop and head to my bedroom. I hesitate for another moment thinking if I should get a little more comfortable before I start this. I end up stripping down to my boxers but I leave those on since I'm unsure of what this is actually going to make me feel. Then I go to a porn website on my laptop and settle on to the bed.
I almost chicken out and click onto something else but stop and take a deep breath before looking at the screen again. I click into the different categories and onto the gay portion of the website. Instantly tons of little screen-shots pop up with men in various states of undress. I bite my lip and just randomly click on one of the videos. It starts with a couple of guys talking in a room and I relax a little just watching it unfold. Then one of the guys, the smaller of the two starts to rub the other through his pants. I lick my lips a little not sure if this is actually turning me on or not. Then they are kissing and I smile thinking that I am at least ok with that part of it. Then the smaller one moves again undoing the other's pants and pulling them down to reveal his hard cock. The bigger one isn't wearing underwear so it just sort of pops out.
I'm a little amazed to find my eyes drawn instantly to his dick and it makes me feel a little strange. When the little one starts to give the other a blow job though I can't take my eyes away at all. Watching those lips slide up and down is very erotic and I feel my heart beating faster as I start to get turned on. I massage myself a little through my boxers as I keep watching the video. Then more clothes come off and suddenly they are both naked. I bite my lip again as the smaller one is now on his hands and knees with his ass bare and right in front of the camera. I have an idea of what is going to happen next but I'm still a little uneasy about it. Then I'm surprised a little though as the bigger man pulls apart the other's butt cheeks then starts licking his butt hole. I cringe a little at the thought but I keep watching. As he works him over with his tongue he starts to finger him as well and that more so than the licking is weirdly erotic as well.
I push my boxers down a bit and start to jerk myself off. I lick my lips again watching him get fingered and then they pull away again. This time when they come together again though there is actual sex. It's strange for me to watching as the large dick enters the tight hole. It's a little shocking how much it turns me on though. My thoughts go to Will and I think about possibly having sex with him. I wonder how it would be to be in a hole that is much tighter then what I'm used to. I moan jerking off faster at this thought and it doesn't take long for me to get to the edge. I lie further back not even bothering to look at the screen now as I jerk myself to completion. Then I hit my climax hard and cum. The intensity of the orgasm is amazing and all I can think of is how good it will feel to have the real thing.